IamWyatt.com Blog

What is wrong with Tiger Woods? Tiger's 2010 results are as follows: T4, Cut, Withdrew, T19, T4, T46, T24. Sure, he's still number one in the world rankings, but this isn't the Tiger we know. Or at least the Tiger we thought we knew. Let's take a closer look.

In 2009 Tiger had nine wins. Out of 22 starts. Hot damn. His last win? November 15 at the JBWere Masters in Australia. Then, the world's most famous athlete, on the fast track to being the greatest golfer of all time, plants his Escalade into a tree and starts dodging both rumors and 9-irons at the hand of an angry (albeit freakin' hot) wife. Then came silence, sex clinics, press conferences, a break up with Hank Haney, a divorce (yes, they're different), and the 2010 results. By any other golfer's standards those links results might be perfectly acceptable, if not down right dreamy. But this isn't any other golfer. This is the man in red. The Sunday surgeon. So, what is wrong with Tiger Woods?

The answer, my friends, is the mojo. He's all out of whack. Bottled up. A caged, well, tiger.  Back in high school our starting point guard refused blow jobs from his girlfriend before games, fearing, I'm not sure what he feared. Maybe that's between his and his long gone girlfriend. Perhaps he thought it would throw off his groove (dumbass). Maybe the same applies to Tiger. He's out of sync, and he needs a tug job. Yup, I said it, the man needs to pop one. 

Tiger: Go find a bleached blond with double Ds, all the appropriate skills, and get your ass back on track. We're counting on you.

Last year the man in the dry fit polos (do you think Nike takes them in around the pecs, or he's just that studly?) was getting all the ass a man could want. The wifey kind of ass, the porn star kind of ass, even the Perkins kind of ass (does that come with a mammoth muffin on the side?). The man was rolling it smooth on the short stuff, and hitting it long and deep with the driver. We, his drooling fans, saw past his hat head and balding hair. Turned away when he gleamed those beaver teeth at the cameras. Didn't care that inspecting the texture and viscosity of our boogers was more interesting than his on camera interviews. He was winning. He was living the dream–professional athlete, supermodel wife, billionaire. Heck, he wasn't just living his dream, he was living our dream.

So, dammit Tiger, get back on track. Don't be ashamed of who you are. You're a player. And a playa'. The sooner you accept who you are, the sooner you can get back to winning and take back some of Roger Federer's Gillette sponsorship, 'cause we all know he isn't earning it. Do whatever it takes to get that swagger back. Just keep your paws off my wife.

I will be there!!

I'm hiring a Web Designer to work with me at Pear Tree Greetings. It's a full time position, with the potential to work from home. Here's the position posting:

"We are looking for an experienced web designer to join our team.    The Web Designer is responsible for designing web experiences, email campaigns, banner ads to support our brand.   The Web Designer will need to be energetic, highly creative, self-motivated and not afraid to present new ideas.  The work environment is very creative, fast paced and deadline driven.  We will expect the Web Designer to be team oriented and able to work independently.  The ability to prioritize and multi-task is a must.
 
We require a Web Designer with a formal education degree (BA,AAS,BFA) or equivalent experience.  The candidate that we consider should have a minimum of 2 years of web design experience.  In addition we require an understanding of HTML and CSS, Adobe Photoshop CS4 and be familiar with Illustrator, InDesign, Flash and Dreamweaver.  This position will require a strong understanding of designing site functionality, email design, intuitive navigation schemes, visual design, and development skills including fonts, typography, page layout, site hierarchy and ability to create clear and compelling user experience.
 
This may be considered a remote position with in the Minneapolis or Philadelphia and surrounding areas.
 
To be considered for this position candidates must submit a cover letter, resume and provide sample URL’s that show proficiency with web design concepts."

Click here for the posting on Monster

This ad really made me think about the Pear Tree brand that I work on, and how we can be memorable yet relevant. I love ads that challenge the status quo and instill a little self-reflection!

Read the full article on AdAge

For those of you who have seen the Droid TV spots, and for those of you who love Apple products, this should brighten your day.

The Leadville 100 is arguably one of the toughest races in the world (the race is basically all above 10,000 feet). Lance finished second last year (first race after coming out of retirement) to 6 time champion Dave Wiens. This year he finished…

Draw a crazy picture,
Write a nutty poem,
Sing a mumble-gumble song,
Whistle through your comb.
Do a loony-goony dance
‘Cross the kitchen floor,
Put something silly in the world
That ain’t been there before.
-Shel Silverstein

Capturing great fall photos can be challenging. We’ve all seen rich, colorful, New England fall photos; the white birch trees turning a golden yellow, dusting the tops of white picket fences along winding roads. While we’d all like to be able to capture iconic images like these, the truth is those moments are magical, and the vast majority of us just aren’t magicians. However, there are great fall photos everywhere you turn. To prove it to you I headed out this morning determined to show you how to capture a great fall photo.
I only had one shot of getting today right, and by today I meant a few short hours. The sky was 100% overcast – no sunshine in sight. It was late morning so all that moody mist had long since disappeared. The leaves had started to turn, but the deep reds and oranges just hadn’t yet blossomed. Knowing that the conditions were less than ideal, I needed a subject. I grabbed my black lab, Stanza, and headed out. [Admission: Stanza is well trained. She'll sit and pose for photos if I ask her to (especially if I have treats in my pocket). But, she's not ideal. Kids, spouses, friends–they all make great subjects for photographs, and are generally more appealing than a slobbery dog. So, if you have an opportunity to put real people in your photograph, you're already one step ahead of me!] 

Portraits
Pumpkins, dried corn stalks, and leaves. Incorporate these elements into a photograph and let your background set the mood for you. Keep your subject the primary focus! In this particular occasion, I didn’t have much to work with. I found some yellow and orange leaves on the opposite side of a creek and tried to make do. I knew Stanza wouldn’t sit still unless she was tired, so I let her run around and splash and do all those things labs love to do. Plus, it’d make her a more interesting subject with some wet fur (on a sunny day this would be much more difficult because the water on her coat would end up being blown out highlights). Today, though, a wet dog was a good dog.

I tried some different angles of this shot, but the best ended up being not showing the creek at all. I laid down to change the perspective (I ended up with very soggy knees and elbows), blurred the background, got my subject sharp, and snapped away.

The key to portraiture is to make your subject work with your background, not compete with it. I knew my background elements weren’t strong, but I introduced enough color to make it seasonal. If I had kept the leaves sharp, the photo would have been too busy. Also, tighten up on your subject and have fun with them! If they are enjoying themselves, you’ll get better photographs (even if your subject is a dog).

What to do when you don’t have anything
The most challenging part of taking great photos is making a photo happen when you just can’t seem to find anything. Today I had adverse conditions, and stripped of my model (who was now rolling gleefully in a pile of dead leaves), I had to make something happen. When you don’t have great conditions, get up close, real close.
These seed pods were interesting to me. They had a sort of wizard-like quality to them and hinted at a rebirth to come after a long winter. I set up shop next to one that had a some color behind it (to warm up the gray of the pod) and snapped this photo.

If you’re ever lacking fall color, look for moisture. Find a lake, a creek, morning dew, go outside just after a rain–just find colorful leaves when they are wet. As I had mentioned, the red leaves hadn’t turned yet, but I found this cluster of fallen leaves swirling in a pool of water. I ended up precariously about 4" from the water for this shot, but I got fall the color I was looking for.

Fall is a great time to take photos. There are always photographs to be taken, but sometimes you have to work a little harder to find them. Hopefully these tips can help you capture some great shots. Remember, you’ll never get great photos unless you go take the pictures. Get out there!